Newspaper Death Watch

I took my Mom to dinner for her birthday last night.  We were both anxiously awaiting the results of the presidential election.  Occasionally we peered around the corner of the dining room to the TV at the bar to see the electoral college count.  We mused about the first time we each voted (in very different decades), and how the way in which we get our information has changed so much.

This morning, I found a website, "Newspaper Death Watch", which chronicles the loss of daily circulation in the top 23 US newspapers.  In the past 6 months, these major newspapers have lost 2% to 13% of their readership, with an average decrease of 6%.  Newspapers in Houston, Newark, Atlanta, Philadelphia and Boston were hit hard.  The venerable Christian Science Monitor announced after a century that it would cease publishing a weekday paper.  TV Guide was sold for a dollar, less than the price of a single copy.  

To paraphrase David Carr of the NY Times in his October 28 column, the tide turned long ago.  Most of us are getting our news online.  It's cheaper, more immediate, more convenient, and saves the forests.  Traffic to newspaper websites is up almost 16% in the third quarter.  So what?  Who cares?  The answer lies not in how the news is delivered but how it is paid for.

More than 90% of a newspaper's revenues come from print ads.  Print ads cost thousands of dollars; online ads may only cost $20 per 1000 customers.  The difference in revenue translates into fewer journalists with tighter deadlines.  Fewer worthy stories will be covered; coverage will lack depth and insight.  Recently one of the speakers at the American Magazine Conference worried that if the trusted news sources vanished the web would become a "cesspool" of useless information.  The quote came from Eric Schmidt, CEO of Google.

The fourth estate seems to be in jeopardy.  It has always been our faithful watchdog exposing corruption, following the beat and sharing well-considered insight.  It remains to be seen how they will reinvent themselves.  But until then, who's going to watch over us?  I am hopeful.  I think people will step up to the plate from unexpected quarters.  Like Roger Ebert, the movie critic, for example, who wrote eloquently about the outcome of the election:

This Land Was Made For You and Me

by Roger Ebert

November 4, 2008

As the mighty tide swept the land on Tuesday night, I was transfixed. As the pundits pondered red states and blue states, projections and exit polls, I was swept with emotion. Not because America was "electing its first Black president." That comes a little late in the day. It was because America was electing the right President.

Our long national nightmare is ending. America will not soon again start a war based on lies and propaganda. We will not torture. We will restore the rights of freedom of speech, freedom of privacy, and habeas corpus. We will enter at last in the struggle against environmental disaster. Our ideas will once again be more powerful than our weapons. During the last eight years, the beacon on the hill flickered out. Now the torch will shine again.

We will bring our troops home, in the right way. Am I against the war? Of course. Do I support our troops? Of course. They were sent to endanger their lives by zealots with occult objectives. More than 4,000 of them have died. Even more lives have been lost by our coalition forces than by our own.

Do I blame George Bush? At the end of the day, I don't know that I really do. I agree with Oliver Stone that Bush never knew he had been misled until it was too late. I blame those who used him as their puppet. The unsmiling men standing in the shadows. On Tuesday the righteous people of America stood up and hammered them down.

Lots of people stayed up late Tuesday night. They listened McCain's gracious, eloquent concession speech. He was a good man at heart, caught up in a perfect storm of history. He had the wrong policies and the wrong campaign. At the end, let me tell you about a hunch I have. In the privacy of the voting booth, I think there is a possibility that Condolezza Rice voted for Obama. Her vote might have had little to do with ideology. She could not stomach the thought of Vice President Palin.

I stayed up late. As I watched, I remembered. In 1968 I was in the streets as a reporter, when the Battle of Grant Park ended eight years of Democratic presidents and opened an era when the Republicans would control the White House for 28 of the next 40 years. "The whole world is watching!" the demonstrators cried, as the image of Chicago was tarnished around the world. On Tuesday night, the world again had its eyes on Grant Park. I saw tens and tens of thousands of citizens with their hearts full, smiling through their tears. As at all of Obama's rallies, our races stood proudly side by side, as it should be. We are finally, finally, beginning to close that terrible chapter of American history

President Obama is not an obsessed or fearful man. He has no grandiose ideological schemes to lure us into disaster. He won because of a factor the pundits never mentioned. He was the grown-up. He has a rational mind, a steady hand, and a first-rate intelligence. But, oh, it will be hard for him. He inherits a wrong war, a disillusioned nation, and a crumbling economy. He may have to be a Depression president.

What gives me hope is that a great idealistic movement rose up to support him. Some say a million and a half volunteers. Millions more donated to his campaign. He won votes that crossed the lines of gender, age, race, ethnicity, geography and political party. He was the right man at a dangerous time. If ever a president was elected by we the people, he is that president.

America was a different place when I grew up under Truman, Eisenhower and, yes, even Nixon. On Tuesday that America remembered itself, and stood up to be counted.

This land is your land,
This land is our land,
From California, to the New York island.
From the redwood forests, to the Gulf Stream waters--
This land was made for you and me.

How Many Film Industry People Does It Take to Screw in a Lightbulb?

Have you ever wondered how many people it takes to make a movie?  I ran across a blog called Film Industry Bloggers.  Every day of the week, except Sunday, five to six film industry specialists blog about topics of interest to them.  They have 32 bloggers in all.

How does this relate to what we do?  Chuck and I fill many of the roles listed, except for the actor of course.  Any task that goes on BEHIND the camera, not in front of it, we'll do.  We can relate to the musings of the Film Bloggers who are employed as: director (on our commercial shoots), producer, production designer, storyboard artist, music supervisor, digital expert, colorist, animation coordinator, editor, key grip, production manager and voice over artist.  Love this blog!

Best Thriller Movies

I recently saw Nick of Time with Johnny Depp.  It reminded me of why I think some movies deserve to be called great.  By telling an intriguing story, they make you feel emotion.  Here are some movies that, no matter how many times I see them, I feel the same intense emotions at the same places in the film.  

Body Heat (1981) - passion; we saw this movie at a drive-in on a cold night and by the middle of the picture, we were sweating from the steamy scenes.

Seven Days in May (1962) - fear and loathing; chilling because at the time the film was released the world was one tick away from a nuclear holocaust.

Like Water for Chocolate (1992) - passion, longing, joy, humor, compassion, sadness for what might have been, for what should have been.  This is not a thriller, but it is a wonderful movie.

L.A. Confidential (1997) - passion, obsession, envy, innocence and the perfect blend of all these elements into a smart, stylish thriller.

Das Boot (1981) - claustrophobia, suspense, loneliness, compassion for an enemy who is more like us than he is different from us.

Manchurian Candidate (1962) - nightmarish horror, hopelessness, ice cold cruelty; makes you want to run home and thank your Mother for being so nice to you.

My Dinner With Andre (1981) - intensely interesting 2-hour conversation between two men who never leave their table at a New York restaurant.  This is not a thriller, but an odd, compelling little movie.

Nick of Time (1995) - fear, anxiety, mistrust, resourcefulness, and tenacity that comes to a satisfying conclusion.

Night of the Hunter (1955) - terror enhanced by every nuance of a film noir style and lyrical images.

Ransom (1996) - hope, anguish, loathing, and finally relief in a plot with several twists you don't see coming; one of the best movie trailers of all time:.

Rear Window (1954) - Hitchcock was the master of finding terror in the most unexpected places.

Blog - Tag!

My friend Stacie Blog-Tagged me.  So, I looked it up.  It's like the children's game of tag where someone says "Tag, You're It!" and you have to do something.  That something, in this case, is mentioning 4 Things I Did Today, 4 Things on My To-Do List, 4 Guilty Pleasures, 4 Little-Known Facts About Me.

What I Did Today

1.  Exercised with Gilad.

2.  Went to the Ritz at Half Moon Bay and shot some scenes for a wedding we filmed last weekend.

3.  Emailed a friend a list of great movies designed to turn on the tears.

4.  Ate a sashimi dinner with Chuck.

To-Do List

1.  Call my friends more often.

2.  Renovate our house.

3.  Buy a new pair of jeans.

4.  Tour Europe.

Guilty Pleasures

1.  Project Runway

2.  Oysters

3.  Opera

4.  Chick Flicks

Factoids About Me

1.  I was interviewed for and appeared in Newsweek.

2.  I climbed on El Capitan in Yosemite.

3.  I saw the Concorde land on its maiden voyage from Paris to Washington DC.

4.  I met Robert Redford.

Now I get to tag four other people:

Jubilee Lau

Duncan Reyes

Melissa Bagley

Michelle Barrionuevo-Mazzini

Burn After Reading - A Movie Review

This is how we felt at the end of Burn After Reading.  But we laughed even harder - nearly fell off the chair.

We've been fans of the Coen Brothers who have a penchant for writing bizarre, off-kilter comedies about ordinary numnuts, noodniks and knuckleheads who turn to crime.  The would-be criminals do not succeed.  But Joel and Ethan do.  

Rather than talk about the plot - you can read about that in Rotten Tomatoes or Roger Ebert's column - we're more intrigued with style.  The Coens start with the style of a screwball comedy with sharp-witted dialogue, irony, and well-developed characters.  Even the bit-players are caricatures with exaggerated personality traits.  I don't think we are meant to identify with these characters, or to derive insight into human nature from them.  I think we are just meant to enjoy their quirkiness.

Burn After Reading seems to complete the trilogy of George Clooney as goofball.  He's suckered his buddy Brad Pitt into being a dim-wit too.  Who knew Brad Pitt was such a versatile actor? It's a long way from A River Runs Through It or Legends of the Fall to the slow-witted personal trainer at the Hardbodies gym.

About Coen Brothers films...A friend asked us how we liked their 1996 movie Fargo.  We said we loved it.  You betcha.  What he meant to ask was "Will I like it?"  The answer would have been no.  His tastes ran more towards mainstream movies not quirky little comedies.  So, be forewarned - this is a typical Coen Brothers extravaganza.  Only you know whether that means you will walk away holding your sides from laughter or with a deer-in-the-headlights dazed look.

Other Coen Brothers movies:

Blood Simple (1984)

Raising Arizona (1987)

Miller's Crossing (1990)

Fargo (1996)

Big Lebowski (1998)

O Brother Where Art Thou? (2000)

The Man Who Wasn't There (2001)

Intolerable Cruelty (2003)

No Country For Old Men (2007)

Raise Your Glasses...

In Four Weddings and a Funeral, Hugh Grant's character is a sweet and lovable bumbling bloke who awkwardly delivers a toast at a wedding.  This has inspired many a best man to think he too can bumble through the toast and that everyone will laugh on cue.  Well...not really. Hugh Grant was a well-rehearsed actor, speaking from a well-honed script, to a room full of actors who were paid to laugh on cue.

We've filmed and edited a fair number of toasts in our time.  Since we see each toast many times while editing it we have a unique viewpoint.  We thought we'd pass along some observations about some toasts that stand above the rest.

The best toasts come from the heart. This takes real courage.  These toasts are full of truth and sometimes give voice to thoughts and feelings that have never been spoken.  We remember a father telling his son for the first time in his life that he was proud of his accomplishments. We've seen one brother tell his brother the groom that he was grateful for all the times the groom fought off the grade school bullies, that he had always looked up to the groom and only wished he could be half the man his brother was.  And we've seen grooms eloquently express their respect, gratitude and love for their brides.  There's nothing quite as endearing as a man declaring his love for his wife in front of a room full of family and friends.

The best toasts are well prepared and well rehearsed.  No one, not even a professional public speaker, can reliably deliver a great speech extemporaneously.  When the toaster is familiar with what he is going to say, he can say it with ease, in a relaxed way, often with humor.   The consequence of poor preparation is rambling--how boring!  

The best toasts are brief.  It is much harder to be succinct, but the reward is often a more powerful message.

The best toasts focus on the bride and groom, not the toaster.

The best toasts wish the couple well.

The best toasts have humor in good taste.

The best toasts come from people who are sober.  Being tipsy can make you think everything you say is funny even though no one else does.

Grooms ask "Do I have to give a toast?"  It's not required, but it is gracious.  

"What do I need to say?"  Three things, in your own words:

1.  Thank you all for coming.  We appreciate the effort it took for you to be with us.  You have contributed to our joy on this day.

2.  My wife and I would like to thank our family and friends for everything they have done for us.  But most of all, we'd like to thank our parents for giving us such perfect role models for how to nurture a long and happy marriage, and love each other every day.

3.  A personal message to your bride:  Thank you for making me the happiest man in the world today.  There is no one else on earth with whom I would rather spend the rest of my life. Would you all please raise your glasses to toast my beautiful bride.

Beauty

What is beauty?  Wikipedia says it is a characteristic of a person, place, object or idea that provides an experience of pleasure.  Often beauty is open to interpretation -- "Beauty is in the eye of the beholder."  Many have written about it, trying to capture its elusive nature.

"Everything has beauty, but not everyone sees it."

---Confucius

"In every man's heart there is a secret nerve that answers to the vibrations of beauty."

---Christopher Morley

"When you have only two pennies left in the world, buy a loaf of bread with one, and a lily with the other."

---Anonymous

Everyone enjoys seeing beauty, however we define it.  Of course the flowers, cake, venue and scenery at a wedding are all very beautiful.  But the greatest beauty we see at weddings is the image of the bride reflected in the eyes of the groom.  And sometimes we even catch a glimpse of beauty as the father of the bride looks adoringly at the mother of the bride as though it was their own wedding.

For the less romantic,  the sensations of love and beauty can be explained in terms of chemistry.  During the first stages of falling in love, phenylethylamine can be triggered by a meeting of the eyes or a touch of the hands resulting in sweaty palms and shaky knees. Chocolate is known to have very high levels of this chemical.  Maybe this is the stuff of which love potions are made.  

After infatuation subsides, endorphins take over.  This is what makes a relationship warm, dependable, calm, stable.  This is what makes you yearn for someone when they are away.  This is one reason why people stay married.

It's not surprising that we seek endorphins wherever they may be -- they just feel so good. That's why "All the world loves a lover."  Because their endorphins are spilling out and we are the beneficiaries.

So, what has inspired me to wax poetic about beauty?  Loyal readers may have noticed our blog is a little more beautiful.  My good and talented friend Stacie Tamaki, the wonderful web designer of Girl Goes Geek redesigned the blog and brought a little more beauty to the world. Thank you so much Stacie!

Relaxation

Who among us couldn't do with a little more calm and relaxation in their lives?  

While researching how to eat healthier, I came across several articles about the benefits of green tea.  I was intrigued enough to start searching for the green tea with the best nutrients.  But on the way, I found that selecting, preparing and enjoying green tea had another benefit - restful mind and relaxation.

There is an optimal way to prepare each tea.  The cup should be warmed, the water should be a certain temperature, the leaves should be steeped for only a few minutes.  I thought this would be a lot of trouble, but I find it is relaxing to take a break in the day, turn my attention to nourishing myself with anti-oxidants and relaxing my mind by enjoying the aroma, the texture and the taste.  

Green teas are a lot like fine wines.  Certain growing regions have a well-deserved reputation for producing the finest teas, there are subtle variations depending upon soil and weather conditions, and the expensive 'reserves' are substantially better than an every day 'red table wine'.

My good friend Stacie knows I'm interested in green tea, so she surprised me with the gift of a canister of Ryokucha from Samovar Tea Lounge.  When she brought it over, we brewed up a pot and shared some time together. What a beautiful green color!  As with wines, there are adjectives that describe green tea.  Some that came to mind for this green tea were grassy, smooth, sweet.  And, all the sweeter because I had a friend to share it with.

If you are cold, tea will warm you.

If you are too heated, it will cool you.

If you are depressed, it will cheer you.

If your are excited, it will calm you.

---William Gladstone

Speed

I feel the need for speed.  

That's how our nephew Nick must feel.  He is among the top 100 cyclists in the country in his age group and was invited to participate in the U.S. National Cycling Championships in Los Angeles last month.  We were thrilled to be there to see him, his team, and all the racers compete.

Here's a 90-sec piece describing how it felt to be a spectator.  First there was the anticipation at the start, then there were 30 grueling laps.  The riders flew by in a matter of seconds, and then there were long stretches of time when you were waiting for them to come around again. And then there was the excitement at the finish as the peleton tried to catch the leaders.

Rendezvous

Everyone says the wedding day flies by so quickly.  That is so true for the bride and groom and their guests.  It's true for us, too.  The day is filled to the brim with activities and people which we are capturing from early in the morning 'til late at night so that we can accurately portray the feeling of the day, and show the people who were important to the couple 

If we had the luxury of time, we could seamlessly film and edit in scenes that would add a very movie-like quality to our wedding movies.  So, in many cases, we do just that.  Either we plan to film on a non-wedding day before we even start filming the wedding day, or we come up with ways to enhance the theme(s) of the wedding while in the editing suite after the wedding.  

Here's an example.  On the third day of a fabulous 3-day wedding weekend, guests were invited to gather at the Ferry Building to catch a chartered ferry to Tiburon where they could relax, sun themselves, have brunch, and listen to a Latin band.  One of the themes on Sunday was orange balloons.  Why orange?  It is the color of the Netherlands, from whence the groom hailed.  The orange balloons served to mark the spot where everyone should gather.  Then throughout the day, we saw children playing with them here and there.

Since this was a destination wedding, we had wanted to show a few San Francisco landmarks somewhere in the wedding movie, so we used orange balloons to connect the scenes (shot on a non-wedding day), then connect back to the live action.  Enjoy this 48-second piece!

Is It Real or Is It Fake?

I saw a story on a blog the other day.

The author, Mark Christiansen who is well-respected in the visual effects industry, noted that parts of the Olympic Games opening ceremonies were faked for the TV audience. If you saw the opening ceremonies, the parts he’s referring to are the ‘footprints in the sky’ created with fireworks. The live audience did see footprints in the sky, but the TV audience saw a different set of footprints that had been computer-generated. It’s similar to having someone lip-synch the national anthem at the start of a baseball game.  Oh, but that happened at the opening ceremonies too!  The very cute 9-year old girl who performed the song was lip-synching to another girl's vocal track.  

As soon as the lip-synching was leaked, the world press had a field day calling the incident "Olympic Karaoke", "Hoax! Made in China", "The Great Beijing Lip-synch Switcheroo", and "China's Wrong Child Policy".

But back to the 'footprints in the sky."  There may have been very good reasons to ‘fake it’. Maybe the Chinese were afraid that the fireworks would be rained out. Or maybe the faked fireworks were more vibrant or easier for the TV audience to see. But it gives us a slightly uneasy feeling because the performance was portrayed as real when it wasn’t.

With the technology that’s available and the skill of today’s technicians and artists, you can’t always trust that what you see is the unvarnished truth. And, this sleight-of-hand can be done almost undetectably. So what’s the big deal? Well, an enjoyable pyrotechnic show at the Olympics whether real or faked is no big deal, although this was a fake on a pretty big scale. We all need be a little bit skeptical, like the folks in Missouri, the “Show-Me” state.

How does this apply to brides who are searching for the best professionals in each category? Scrutinize online reviews with a grain of salt.  Sure, there are less-than-professional vendors out there who deserve the 3, 5 10, even 20 bad reviews they get.  These are to be taken seriously because these companies routinely disappoint brides.  Chat rooms serve brides well in these cases.

On the other hand, there isn't one professional I know who hasn't been unfairly slammed with a bad review online.  In the first year we were in business, an unscrupulous competitor whom we had never met, posing as a bride, said some pretty nasty things about us that hurt us deeply since we care very much about giving our best to every bride. We provided evidence of the fraud to the hosting site, but they would not remove the post.  Thankfully, that was our only brush with 'the dark side'.

So, if you see virtually all excellent posts about a professional, and then you see a negative post, be skeptical.  Check it out for yourself.

Color Part II: Color Grading

In my last post, Color, Part I we discussed the need for color correction in a wedding movie because there are many different lighting conditions which are not ideal, and over which we have little control. Accurate color, particularly in skin tones, makes a big difference to the overall quality of the movie.  We are one of the few wedding cinematographers who color correct all of our movies.

In Color, Part II, we will discuss color grading, which is giving a specific look that enhances the mood of a scene or of the whole movie.

Here are two paintings by Andrew Wyeth.  In one he uses warm golden tones; in the other, cooler more subdued tones.  Which is preferable?  To us, the answer depends on which matches the mood you are trying to convey.

  

In No Country For Old Men, a dark drama, the colorist created a torrid, washed-out dust-bowl, lonely and melancholy look.   Mama Mia, an upbeat musical, used bright, primary, super-saturated colors.  Memoirs of a Geisha used dramatic lighting, shadow and light, which was slightly underexposed to enhance the drama and gravity in each scene.  

We will sometimes select a color palette and texture to emphasize the mood of a part of the wedding day.  For one of our very soft-spoken sweet brides, we selected a pastel palette, with an almost watercolor feel which perfectly matched her personality.  

On another occasion, as our bride descended a grand staircase, she shared some very emotional moments with her father who shed tears of joy as he saw her in her wedding gown and veil for the first time.   As they waited in a dark ballroom to walk down the aisle, they looked just like the Vermeer painting on the left, Girl with a Pearl Earring. Their faces seemed to emerge from the darkness with one side deeply in shadow, the other bathed in golden late afternoon sun.  Although we did not design the lighting and did not direct them to stand in a certain spot, we were able to recognize this great opportunity and put the camera in a position to capture it perfectly.  So sometimes, color grading can be accomplished while filming, rather than in post-production.

Until a few years ago, color grading was relatively rare in Hollywood.  But now, 95% of films are color graded.  Just as with feature films, we color grade in order to create a specific mood. We feel that color grading is just part of doing the best we can for each of our clients.

Here are some interesting websites that explore color:

Color Theory - www.worqx.com/color

Fashion & Color Trends - www.fashiontrendsetter.com

Meaning of Colors - www.sibagraphics.com/colour.php

Color Part I: Color Correction

Color is all around us.  We notice it from a young age when we are 'coloring' with our box of Crayolas.  We play with colorful toys like a bright yellow pail and shovel, a little red wagon and a bright green 'First Computer'. 

As we get older, we make color choices for the places we live and work, the cars we drive and the clothes we wear.  There are companies which make a good business of color - Pantone, Benjamin Moore, and every Paris fashion designer.

Why do we care?  Because colors have meaning.  

In our business, we believe since color is important to our brides, it is important to portray color correctly throughout a scene.  Accurate color is one of the 6 basic criteria of evaluating videography.  [See s

idebar Videography Criteria to the lower right of this post.]  We are one of the few wedding cinematographers in the country who do extensive color work in post-production includi

ng adjusting the colors, luminance/brightness, and contrast to match the shots from our multiple cameras.

First, before we shoot a single frame, we calibrate each of our cameras to produce true and accurate color, and to match each other perfectly.  Then, we fine-tune the color balance on our cameras at the event to further ensure a perfect match among cameras.  

Lighting and color can vary wildly from a bride's preparation filmed under yellow incandescent lights, to a ceremony shot in (blue) shade outdoors, and a rece

ption filmed in a (red) wine cave. In post-production, we make adjustments to ensure it is not too jarring to go from one scene to the next. It's relatively easy to make these adjustments on a single photograph 

with Photoshop. But when you're operating on each clip (clip=a series of frames that encapsulate a single scene or action) of a 30 to 40 minute movie, it's not a trivial task.  

There are about 1200 clips in one of our wedding movies.  Sometimes one clip requires several color and exposure adjustments as a bride and groom walk down the aisle from the candle lit interior of a cathedral out the doors into bril

liant sunlight.   It is more art than science, so a lot of practice and a lot of patience is required.  

We color correct because we have very little control over lighting at a wedding.  And yet, we want skin tones to look flattering and the scene to be pleasing to the eye.  So, we film as well as circumstances allow, then color correct in post-production. Here is a scene which is too blue.

Now, here is the same scene with color enhancement to make the scene warmer.   It's more pleasing to our eyes because this is what we are accustomed to seeing.  Even when the scene really is too blue, our brains correct what our eyes see.

These days, there are so many different televisions each with multiple color adjustments. When we deliver our movies, how can we be certain the true colors will be seen?   We use a calibrated color monitor. That means we can be 100% certain that the colors in the movie are accurate. And these days, we like to deliver the movie and see for ourselves how it looks on the screen. Frequently our clients thank us for making recommendations for tuning up the TV's color not just so they can see their wedding movie in real color, but so they can view broadcast TV shows and Blockbuster videos in accurate color too.

Once you've mastered accurate color, what's the next frontier?  In Hollywood, digital colorists are giving movies a certain look through the process of 'color grading'.  In Color, Part II, we'll explore color grading.

BlogHer

I met a most interesting lady at a weekly dinner last night. Elisa Camahort, one of the founders of the very popular BlogHer.com. 

She's a mover and a shaker. She saw a need for a community of bloggers back in 2006 and a scant 2 years later over 2200 bloggers are interconnected worldwide, providing a tremendous resource in diverse fields from health to finance to law to mommy issues to feminism. The BlogHer annual conferences have attracted keynote speakers such as Arianna Huffington, Elizabeth Edwards and Carol Lin (CNN).

Elisa's accomplishments are impressive. But what really impressed me about Elisa was her passion for what she does. She spoke with fervor about why she started the business and what she was trying to accomplish. She provides a welcoming environment for both women and men to help one another by sharing information. Many of the blogs are quite inspiring - like the cancer survivors. Many are informative and entertaining on topics a little less earth-shattering - like the BeautyHacks comparing Creme de la Mer's $125/oz anti aging cream to Olay's Regenerist Cream at $15/oz. [The verdict: they are both good.]

In a world that is increasingly isolating (if measured by the number of people connected to electronic devices rather than talking with people), BlogHer is an entity that brings people back together.  Way to go Elisa!

A Calmer Gentler World

I used to be a Type A personality with a CAPITAL A! I lived my life in CAPITAL LETTERS. EXCLAMATION MARK! But over the years I calmed down quite a bit. And even more so recently when I resolved to try to take 5 minutes - just 5 minutes a day - to breathe and relax. It's been a struggle to remember to integrate it into my life. But, when I'm in the car waiting at a red light and have nothing better to do, I somehow manage to do it.

I believe there's been a reaction to my action. I see a kinder, calmer, gentler world out there. Take last night. I went to Whole Foods to satisfy my craving for fresh oysters. Felix, the man behind the counter stepped up to serve me, with a smile. I told him what I wanted. As he reached into the tank to retrieve the mollusks, he accidentally squirted me with water - all over. Rather than getting mad, I laughed and thanked him for cooling me off. He was a bit horrified, asked if I was OK, and offered me a towel. But it was nothing. As he was shucking those little guys, he was explaining the difference among oysters, and how to tell if they are fresh. [Tap the shell. If it sounds like a rock, it's OK. If it sounds a little hollow, it is not OK.] By the time he was done, he'd filled my order, given me two samples, and sneaked in two extra oysters to make up for the soaking.

It's a small thing, but rich or poor, we all like to get a little something for nothing every now and again. I knew I'd be coming back many more times to buy oysters from Felix. Felix's act of kindness made me feel gentler as I moved on to the checkout. There, the cashier rang up my produce incorrectly four times. She was getting more and more flustered even though I told her not to worry, I was in no hurry, it was OK. I didn't have the heart to call her attention to another error. So, I headed over to customer service to correct the error.

The customer service manager confirmed I'd been overcharged. She cheerly refunded the entire amount for the produce in crisp dollars bills. I smiled and waited expectantly for her to weigh the red trevesino and tell me what I owed. But, she just smiled back, thanked me for my patience with the cashier, said it was their error, and apologized for my inconvenience. She said, "No charge." For the second time that night I felt calm begets calm. A smile begets a smile. In my Type A world, there would only have been misery. In my calmer, gentler world there is only peace.

The Flirty Guide

My ears were burning! Stacie Tamaki, founder of The Flirty Guide blogged about us yesterday. She has her finger on the pulse of 100's if not 1000's of professionals in the wedding industry in the San Francisco Bay Area. She's very selective about who she chooses to feature on The Flirty Guide, so we were all the more honored when she chose to shine a spotlight on us. Here is what she said:

"Savadelis Films never does anything the fast or easy way, they only know one way to do things: The right way.

The amount of preparation they devote to each client is, to me, beyond impressive. Their professionalism always leaves me in a bit of awe because they are uncompromising in producing films of the highest quality no matter how much effort it takes for them to do so.

Their impeccably edited wedding films range in style from modern, romantic, documentary, to period pieces. You can view two samples here and can also visit their website portfolio page to view more trailers. Especially view "Come What May." It's only 1 minute and 22 seconds long and is one my favorites. From the moment the groom sweeps his bride off of her feet at the top of the staircase, the reception montage is high energy and exciting because of how beautifully it was filmed and edited..

"Fever" (A fun, high energy, dance, reception trailer)

Chuck and Jewel Savadelis are absolutely passionate about creating films that tell the story of the wedding day. I know a lot of companies in many industries say they are passionate about what they do but Savadelis Films doesn't just talk the talk... They produce films that back it up. They work exclusively in High Def and a third camera at each event is standard, not an option. There is nothing accidental, lucky or left to chance when it comes to gathering the elements they'll need to create their finished films. Rather it is planning, forethought and intention that guarantee the quality of their content. After, they insist on editing each and every video in-house to ensure the highest level of quality and control during the editing process.

"Memoirs of a Wedding"
(A venue, pre-ceremony, ceremony, reception montage trailer)

Watch one of their video trailers and you might not know what to call them or what they do. To many of their fans their work transcends traditional videography. Recently, after viewing their "Fever" trailer, I listened to one bride describe their work using words like "cinematography" and "mini-movie" to another bride who had asked her about a videographer recommendation.

I'm so proud to have them on The Flirty Guide and to be able to introduce them to you here today :D"

Thank you Stacie! By the way, Stacie was just interviewed by Ralph Mucci on The Wedding Planning Audiocast because she is widely considered to be one of the Top 10 wedding bloggers in the country.

She's right up there with Abby Larson of Style Me Pretty (we're featured in San Francisco and in Napa),
Christy Weber of Junebug Weddings,
Vane Broussard of The Brooklyn Bride,
Melissa of Melissa's Smitten and
Janie Medley of The Bride's Cafe.

Liberated!

The other day we had a little visitor in our house - a hummingbird! We live in an Eichler-like home with sliding glass doors in every room leading to an interior atrium and an exterior garden. All of our doors were open and we were enjoying a nice breeze. Then we heard some chirping. We looked around and there, up near the top of the 16' ceiling near the clerestory windows was a little hummingbird beating his wings furiously.

We tried to guide him down to one of the open doors, but the chirping got louder, and his stress was increasing. So we left the room and he found a splinter on the beams on which to rest. When we came back, he was lying on the floor, poor exhausted thing. So we scooped him up and gently put him outside. It only took a moment for him to fly into the nearest tree. There are times when I know how frustrated and then how liberated that little bird felt.

Our cat was very disappointed that she wasn't given an opportunity to get 'up close and personal'.

Mary's Wedding

Mom and I went to see a short play yesterday at the California Theater Center, Mary's Wedding. This wasn't a lavish production, but it was very moving. It had just two actors. But what a magnificent job they did!

The play is set on the eve of World War I in which a young woman recounts a dream, more like a nightmare at times, that involves two scenes that are beautifully interwoven: Mary and Charlie's early courtship in a barn safe at home and Charlie's harrowing experiences on the battlefield. Though the action jumps in time and place, "Mary's Wedding" was well-balanced in its alternating story lines of love and war. At times it was pure poetry.

The characters seemed so real. Mary was chaste and demure in a silky white dress that looked like a nightgown. But she displayed more mature qualities of intelligence, compassion and strength when she calmed Charlie's fears during the thunderstorms. Charlie was confident and daring on the battlefield, but sheepish and youthful when meeting Mary's mother over tea. They had many dimensions, some conflicting, like all of us.

The story was one that transcends time and place -- the agony of being separated from a loved one. And it was about regret over what might have been. You know it's a good play or movie when you were mesmerized during the performance and speechless when it was over.

Bliss

After the last post about Happiness, I decided to go out and actively pursue a little Happiness. So what is happiness? The Oxford Happiness Inventory, a broad measure of psychological well-being measures happiness as an aggregate of self-esteem, sense of purpose, social interest and kindness, sense of humor and aesthetic appreciation. Aesthetic appreciation - yes! That's for me!

So, Chuck and I decided to finally use the wonderful gift certificate our friends Linda Hylen (Julia Morgan Ballroom), Terry Adams (Nob Hill Ensembles), Teri Menchini (La Bocca Fina Catering), Leighsa Smyser (Branch Out), and Marilyn Tabatsky (Have Your Cake) gave us five years ago for a stay at the Gables Inn in Sausalito. Our anniversary was coming up, so this was a perfect opportunity. This was a beautiful piece of architecture, so we were off on our aesthetic journey.

The Gables Inn was indeed charming and romantic, very clean, spacious, comfortable, and run by very nice people. We went to various corners of the Bay Area and played tourist for 3 days.

We started our journey at Audobon Canyon Ranch in Bolinas, near Stinson Beach, which is only open on weekends through July 13. What a wonderful preserve. There were over 50 egrets and herons nesting in the trees. These elegant birds which are 5' tall swoop down to the lagoon for some fishing, then fly back up to the treetops to feed their young. You get a remarkable view from across the canyon with high-powered telescopes placed at strategic places and docents ready to answer any questions. We were so glad the third-generation owners of this tract of land decided to preserve it so we could all see the beauty of nature and the grace of these birds, rather than selling to a major corporation that had designs to fashion a resort with golf course, condo's and other activities that would have driven the birds away forever.

We took a leisurely drive to Limantour Beach, walked and enjoyed the view, which was just exquisite. Then, we had dinner at the Olema Inn out on a terrace overlooking a tranquil garden. Lovely.

The next day, we visited the Conservatory of Flowers where one room was dedicated to butterflies - live butterflies flying in every direction. They were beautiful, but it was the wonder and joy on the faces of the little children that was even more terrific. We should all be like little kids - seeing things as if for the first time.

Then we went on a docent-led tour of Women Impressionists at the Legion of Honor. Our docent was such a skilled storyteller that she allowed you to get inside the heads of four very talented painters and understand the restricted lives they lived and how it affected their paintings. Before we took the tour, we wandered through the exhibit. We had commented that the subject of many of the paintings were women and children. The women in the paintings seemed to have a far-off gaze as though they had time on their hands, they were bored or sad, or trapped in some unhappiness or another.

After the tour, we understood why. In the late 19th century, respectable women required a chaperone to go out in public. And even then, many public places were off limits to decent women. Women of this strata of society had few duties. They were not even allowed to care for their own children; a nanny did that. This shaped the way women lived. Many of the male impressionist painters of the same time were free to paint either portraits or landscapes or anything they chose to. Thank you Berthe Morisot, Mary Cassatt, Eva Gonzales and Marie Bracquemond for making inroads for all the women who came after you!

On our third day, finally relaxed and almost entirely blissed out, we got up late, had breakfast with some international visitors, then slowly drove home via Route 1 past Half Moon Bay where we scouted a few locations for a piece were are filming for a bride and groom in early July.

It didn't take long to rediscover what relaxation and happiness are. And, we didn't have to travel far to find it.

Happiness

I just had to go see S*x and the City, so I went with one of my good friends, Stacie, founder of The Flirty Guide.

So here we are with our gal pals Carrie, Samantha, Miranda and Charlotte 5 years after the TV show ends. Carrie and Mr. Big finally tied the knot. But will it lead to Happiness, with a capital 'H'? Probably not. The How of Happiness by Sonja Lyubomirsky says that only 10% of our happiness can be attributed to life circumstances such as whether you are rich or poor, beautiful or plain, healthy or unhealthy, married or single. So now just because Carrie is married and is much richer because she married Mr. Big, her happiness will probably not change much.

Of our four heroines, it seems that Charlotte understands the secret of Happiness best. When Samantha asks her, "How often are you happy in your relationship?" Charlotte answers; "Every day." Sam asks again, "Every day?!!" and Charlotte answers, "Well, not all day every day but yes, every day." That would seem to be because Charlotte (always my favorite of the bunch) has a variety of traits shared by the happiest people.

o They express gratitude.
o They practice acts of kindness.
o They cultivate optimism.
o They savor life's pleasures.
o They learn to forgive.
o They practice spirituality.
o They exercise and are active.
o They are committed to pursuing lifelong goals and ambitions.
o They show poise and strength in the face of adversity.
o They nurture relationships.

To me, Charlotte is definitely a heroine for living life to the fullest every day. Every day? Yes, every day.