Showing posts with label Personal. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Personal. Show all posts

Saturday, August 29, 2009

Ted Kennedy

Ted Kennedy. A man who was very human.  

He made a lot of mistakes, including substance abuse, womanizing (there's an old-fashioned word), and the whole Chappaquiddick incident. 

Even more remarkable than committing these errors, was his determination to do better, to rise above them. Perhaps it made him more forgiving of shortcomings in others. As he famously said,

"I recognize my own shortcomings -- the faults in the conduct of my private life. I realize that I alone am responsible for them, and I am the one who must confront them. I believe that each of us as individuals must not only struggle to make a better world, but to make ourselves better, too."

At yesterday's memorial service Vice President Joe Biden made some personal remarks about his friend of 36 years.  In the early 1970's Joe's wife and daughter were killed in a car accident. Ted Kennedy hardly knew Joe Biden at that time. Nevertheless Ted called Joe to express his condolences. For months, Ted would drop by Joe's office once or twice a week to see how he was doing. Ted pulled him out of his grief, mentored him in the ways of Washington DC politics, and was as good a friend as a man could be. Sadly, we rarely heard about this side of Ted Kennedy. 

But my husband Chuck saw this side. When Chuck was Director of Photography at Northeastern University in Boston, he had the opportunity to photograph Ted Kennedy. Mr. Kennedy was charismatic, warm and personable, energetic and passionate and above all, genuine. Even though Chuck was "just the photographer", Mr. Kennedy treated Chuck with dignity, respect and warmth.

Whether we personally met him or not, whether we agree with his politics or not, we are all touched by his efforts to secure equal rights for all people. Although he never became President, perhaps he had an even larger influence as a legislator respected by colleagues on both sides of the aisle. 

Farewell, Ted Kennedy.

Wednesday, August 26, 2009

Smell the Roses



















We all rush, rush, rush through our lives. It's hard to take a minute to do the essential - eat, sleep, breathe. So it's not surprising that we hardly ever slow down to savor a sweet moment. Well, I'm doing that right now. 

We received this note from a very sweet couple whose wedding movie we produced in September, 2005. They had a beautiful baby boy three years ago  and had just brought home the newest addition to their family, a beautiful daughter. They took a moment to write a note to us. Here's an excerpt:


Hi Chuck and Jewel,
 
We recently showed Aidan [their 3-yr old son] our wedding video.  He loved it!  He shouted "mama and papa" and pointed at the TV.  We have such fond memories of our experience with you and the making of the video was so much fun. 
 
We sincerely hope that both of you are doing well! Please keep in touch.
 
Take good care,
Nancy and Eric


This letter reminds us of what we do and why we do it.


Sunday, March 29, 2009

My Long Lost Cousin

The internet is great. Facebook in particular. I've reconnected with a lot of people who have been a blessing and joy in my life. Most recently I reconnected with a dear cousin after...well you don't need to know how long it is, suffice to say it's been a looooong time. 

My cousin Milo Hess is and always has been a talented artist. When we were 6 years old I remember him sketching the faces of our family and it wasn't just kid's play. These were recognizable faces, each had character, and he even exaggerated key features to form the true personality of each person. It was remarkable. He was a prodigy.

I was so jealous that he knew at such an early age what his life's calling was. He's one of the lucky ones whose aspirations and talent coincidence. He knew what he wanted and he went after it. He attended Pratt in NYC on scholarship, served as art director at major broadcasting networks and is now a freelance artist and photographer in NY. I'm awfully proud of him. I always knew he would be a great success, no matter what the obstacles placed in his path, because of his remarkable talent.  

Above is a sample of what he does. I love how streamlined the image and message are. In this 100 mile per hour life we all live, all you get is a second to make an impression. And Cousin Milo makes a great first impression. Glad to know you again, Milo.

Saturday, February 28, 2009

When Love Is Not Enough

 







I have a new plaything- Alltop! I go to the weddings page and randomly scroll over blog post titles. If the first paragraph is interesting, I'll read a little more. That is the way I found this incredibly brave and inspiring post from a woman in NYC who had love and a loving relationship, but not heat and passion. Just like Meg Ryan's character in Sleepless in Seattle. Is love enough? Click HERE to find out. Beautifully written and heart-wrenching.

Wednesday, December 31, 2008

Best Picture of 2008

In a never-ending quest to find thought-provoking content for my blog I searched for "The Best of 2008" and came up with...nada. I would have put Jib-Jab's 2-minute video of 2008 Year in Review here, but, it's well, a little gross. So, let me leave you with one of the most extraordinary images ever taken. Here is an erupting volcano which generated an explosive electrical storm 800 miles south of Santiago, Chile. Here are some other photos of the same volcano which are strangely beautiful.


Thursday, December 25, 2008

Christmas Light Show

It's so hard to balance good taste with over-the-top synchronized lights. This Christmas light show seems to have achieved it.




Merry Christmas!

Merry Christmas!

Chuck and I are sitting on the sofa, watching the twinkling lights on the Christmas tree, sipping hot apple cider and counting our blessings.  

We are grateful to have met and been befriended by an unbroken chain of wonderful brides and grooms and their families.

We are humble in the shadow of the prodigious talents of our wedding industry colleagues who inspire us.

And we are indebted to our family and friends who love and support us all year long.

Merry Christmas Everyone!

Wednesday, December 24, 2008

Christmas Yule Log III

For a humorous take on how to ever-so-pompously direct a movie, take a look at this 2-minute video:



Monday, December 22, 2008

Santacon 2008, San Francisco Style

The Cacophony Society began SantaCon in San Francisco way back in 1994.  It has spread to the the farthest reaches of the world since then.  During the month of December, you can see hundreds of Santas running amuck in Beijing, Belfast, Honolulu, London, Melbourne, Montreal, Munich,  New York, Paris, and 50 other cities.  

There were 70,000 Santas at the Moscow Santacon this year.  There's no holding back the Red Tide! 

As my good friend Viola Sutanto (the super-talented graphic designer of invitations) at Chewing the Cud said, "You can never have too many Santas!"

Here is a taste of what a portion of the San Francisco SantaCon 2008 looked like.

Santa Is On His Way 
(running time: 3:03)
To see this l'il movie in better resolution, click on Quicktime orWindows Media.  Enjoy!

My good friend Duncan Reyes of f. duncan reyes events by design sent me this photo of SantaCon 2006 taken by Bradford Shepherd.  As the bride and groom emerged from St. Peter and Paul Cathedral, they were indeed surprised to see Santas everywhere!

Saturday, December 20, 2008

You Be the Judge

Chuck and I have been tapped to join the Silver Telly Council.  As winners of multiple Telly Awards for excellence in filming and editing creativity, we were among a small pool of people being considered to be judges of this prestigious 30-year old award.  We were selected and we are honored!  So, within the next year, we will judge video entries submitted by ad agencies, corporations, TV stations,  production companies to see if their work meets the exacting criteria of the Telly Awards.  Last year they received over 14,000 entries. Past winners include the Oprah Winfrey Show, Universal Studios, and the Discovery Channel.

When it rains it pours.  We were also asked to judge the new EMPixx awards, newly established by David Carter, a multiple Emmy and Clio winner who has a long history of innovation in the creative world.  I was curious as to why he picked us to be a judge.  So I asked.  He said that over the last 3 years he had viewed over 6000 websites.  From the ones he saw that he liked, he made serious inquiries about the people and their businesses from their colleagues.  He said our colleagues had many fine things to say about us.  There's nothing like attaining the respect of your colleagues - since they know exactly what it takes to do an outstanding job.  Again, we are thrilled and honored.

Let the games begin!


Friday, December 12, 2008

Who's In the Doghouse Now?

Christmas is approaching.  It's a season fraught with pitfalls - particularly for the man in your life.  He 's searching, searching for just the right gift for you.  Every now and again he takes a misstep.  For anyone who recognizes this scenario only too clearly, you have just got to see this terrific little video!  It's called Beware of the Doghouse and it is hilarious!  You can put people "in the doghouse" and announce to the world how they done you wrong.  Although it's an ad for buying jewelry, it will touch a chord with any woman who's ever been given the wrong gift by the man in her life.



Saturday, December 06, 2008

Smell the Roses


Life isn't all work.  The other night I went to the Preston Wynne Open House where my friend Stacie Tamaki, founder of The Flirty Guide, and I received some much needed mini-treatments - neck and shoulder massage, hand massage, and so forth.  I was waiting in line to get a Flower Essence Energy reading by Rev. Maggie Smith. Have you ever felt a compulsion - you just have to have it? That's how I felt about this. So, I waited. My (im)patience was rewarded. I was the last client she took before the end of the event.

So what goes on at a session?  It's quite relaxing.  Maggie calms and soothes with her silky voice. Then, you are presented a deck of 88 cards, each with the picture of a flower.  You select the six you like best.  Each card represents an aspect of your life which either is going well or needs repair.  Maggie interpreted each one I chose.  She was 100% correct.  I have already started to restore balance and wholeness to a life that was tilted too much toward work.  And, Maggie will be sending a small spray of heavenly scented flower essences created just for me based upon the reading that will help me achieve my goal of balance.  Thank you Maggie!  

If you are interested in some gentle introspection, contact Maggie.  You can either visit her in Santa Cruz, contact her via phone or contact her via the internet.  Oh, and she also performs life ceremonies such as weddings, baptisms and funerals.  

Monday, November 17, 2008

Behind the Name

Chuck asked for equal time in introducing his hard drives (we alternate naming them).  
Picard - Chuck is a big Star Trek fan.  Need I say more, Jean Luc?

Bronto - at the time, this was a real "brontosaurus", our biggest hard drive with 475 GB.  Now, it's just a compsognathus (smallest known dinosaur).

Gargantuan - this 975 GB drive is our biggest and will comfortably hold the raw footage for a 3-day wedding.



Pele,  the Goddess of Fire - this was our first "firewire" drive.

Tyro - a Greek princess who had two sons by Poseidon and was the ancestor of many great mythic heroes such as Jason the Argonaut, and heroes in the Trojan War.


Koko - the gorilla who understands over 1000 signs in American Sign Language and over 2000 English words.  She befriended several cats, notably All Ball, her first pet.

Samwise - the stalwart best friend of Frodo Baggins in Lord of the Rings; the only ring-bearer strong enough to resist the temptation of the ring's power.

What's In a Name?

We're all superstitious in some way.  Chuck and I name our hard drives after mythical characters who have exhibited reliability, trustworthiness and heroic qualities.  In this way, we figure, we are giving our hard drives something to live up to.  Here are some of the names we've come up with.  Since they are often obscure, I've included who the characters were.

Togo - The true hero of the original Ididerod, which became known as the Great Race of Mercy. Of the twenty mushers who rushed the  diphtheria serum the 674 miles from Nenana to Nome in 1925, the man who drove the furthest in perilous conditions was Alaska's great sled dog racer Leonhard Seppala. And the dog that led Seppala's team for 265 miles, including a long stretch over the fracturing ice of Norton Sound was a small, feisty Siberian Husky named Togo.


Casole - the "actor" who played the title role in the Black Stallion (1979).  Arabian horses are known for their exceptional beauty, elegance, grace, intelligence, balance, speed and stamina.  They are hearty in order to survive harsh desert conditions.  Arabians are the stuff of legend.  Alexander the Great rode one.

Demelza - female lead in the 1970's BBC series, Poldark. Demelza, a 13-year old servant girl, develops into a charming, amusing, generous, resourceful, resilient, courageous, loyal, beautiful woman, winning the love and affection of Ross Poldark.


Veronica Franco - a poet and the most celebrated courtesan of 16th century Venice.  She was a published author and founded a charity for courtesans and their children.  She was one of the few who successfully defended herself during the inquisition for witchcraft, with dignity and wit.  The movie Dangerous Beauty (1998) tells her tale.


Mrs Miniver - Greer Garson played the title role in Mrs Miniver (1942).  Mrs Miniver met the deprivations and tragedies of WWII with equanimity, courage and humor while being gracious to all whom she meets, putting the needs of family and friends ahead of her own.

Wednesday, November 12, 2008

The Four Agreements

Sometimes I have a hard time communicating with my Mother.  What's new! We went to see a show this weekend. And as she got into the car, I noted she had an umbrella.  In a neutral tone (or so I thought) I asked, "Mom, is it supposed to rain today?"  I figured maybe she had listened to the weather report and knew something I did not.  Silently I was wondering why she was carrying an umbrella on a sunny day with a cloudless sky.

Her response was unexpected.  She got mad and asked why I had insulted her.  I was taken aback!  How can you take offense if I'm just discussing the weather?!

So, I went back to "my corner of the ring" and considered what I had done wrong.  But I had no framework to evaluate this odd interchange.  Later that day I faintly heard the words from a ceremony Chuck was editing.  The officiant read Don Miguel Ruiz' Four Agreements.  They are:

1.  Be Impeccable With Your Word
Speak with integrity. Say only what you mean. Avoid using the word to speak against yourself or to gossip about others. Use the power of your word in the direction of truth and love. 

2. 
Don't Take Anything Personally
Nothing others do is because of you. What others say and do is a projection of their own reality, their own dream. When you are immune to the opinions and actions of others, you won't be the victim of needless suffering. 

3. 
Don't Make Assumptions
Find the courage to ask questions and to express what you really want. Communicate with others as clearly as you can to avoid misunderstandings, sadness and drama. With just this one agreement, you can completely transform your life. 

4. 
Always Do Your Best
Your best is going to change from moment to moment; it will be different when you are healthy as opposed to sick. Under any circumstance, simply do your best, and you will avoid self-judgment, self-abuse and regret.


Ah ha!  It's easy to see that Mom was the offender here.  She violated Agreements #2 and 3 - Don't take it personally and Don't make assumptions.  Obviously, I huffed, she assumed I meant to insult her.  Always thinking the worst of people.  But wait a minute.  Was I totally blameless?  

Maybe my fault lay in not living up to the first agreement. Maybe I was mindlessly making chit-chat and didn't bring full attention and focus to my Mother.  Maybe I didn't say "Mom, is it supposed to rain today?" with truth and love. Being a sensitive woman, maybe she felt the 1% of sarcasm I thought I had hid so well. Well, I guess we were both at fault.  

All you can do is your best (see Agreement #4).  So next time, I'll do better. 

Wednesday, November 05, 2008

Newspaper Death Watch

I took my Mom to dinner for her birthday last night.  We were both anxiously awaiting the results of the presidential election.  Occasionally we peered around the corner of the dining room to the TV at the bar to see the electoral college count.  We mused about the first time we each voted (in very different decades), and how the way in which we get our information has changed so much.
This morning, I found a website, "Newspaper Death Watch", which chronicles the loss of daily circulation in the top 23 US newspapers.  In the past 6 months, these major newspapers have lost 2% to 13% of their readership, with an average decrease of 6%.  Newspapers in Houston, Newark, Atlanta, Philadelphia and Boston were hit hard.  The venerable Christian Science Monitor announced after a century that it would cease publishing a weekday paper.  TV Guide was sold for a dollar, less than the price of a single copy.  

To paraphrase David Carr of the NY Times in his October 28 column, the tide turned long ago.  Most of us are getting our news online.  It's cheaper, more immediate, more convenient, and saves the forests.  Traffic to newspaper websites is up almost 16% in the third quarter.  So what?  Who cares?  The answer lies not in how the news is delivered but how it is paid for.

More than 90% of a newspaper's revenues come from print ads.  Print ads cost thousands of dollars; online ads may only cost $20 per 1000 customers.  The difference in revenue translates into fewer journalists with tighter deadlines.  Fewer worthy stories will be covered; coverage will lack depth and insight.  Recently one of the speakers at the American Magazine Conference worried that if the trusted news sources vanished the web would become a "cesspool" of useless information.  The quote came from Eric Schmidt, CEO of Google.

The fourth estate seems to be in jeopardy.  It has always been our faithful watchdog exposing corruption, following the beat and sharing well-considered insight.  It remains to be seen how they will reinvent themselves.  But until then, who's going to watch over us?  I am hopeful.  I think people will step up to the plate from unexpected quarters.  Like Roger Ebert, the movie critic, for example, who wrote eloquently about the outcome of the election:

This Land Was Made For You and Me
by Roger Ebert
November 4, 2008

As the mighty tide swept the land on Tuesday night, I was transfixed. As the pundits pondered red states and blue states, projections and exit polls, I was swept with emotion. Not because America was "electing its first Black president." That comes a little late in the day. It was because America was electing the right President.

Our long national nightmare is ending. America will not soon again start a war based on lies and propaganda. We will not torture. We will restore the rights of freedom of speech, freedom of privacy, and habeas corpus. We will enter at last in the struggle against environmental disaster. Our ideas will once again be more powerful than our weapons. During the last eight years, the beacon on the hill flickered out. Now the torch will shine again.

We will bring our troops home, in the right way. Am I against the war? Of course. Do I support our troops? Of course. They were sent to endanger their lives by zealots with occult objectives. More than 4,000 of them have died. Even more lives have been lost by our coalition forces than by our own.

Do I blame George Bush? At the end of the day, I don't know that I really do. I agree with Oliver Stone that Bush never knew he had been misled until it was too late. I blame those who used him as their puppet. The unsmiling men standing in the shadows. On Tuesday the righteous people of America stood up and hammered them down.

Lots of people stayed up late Tuesday night. They listened McCain's gracious, eloquent concession speech. He was a good man at heart, caught up in a perfect storm of history. He had the wrong policies and the wrong campaign. At the end, let me tell you about a hunch I have. In the privacy of the voting booth, I think there is a possibility that Condolezza Rice voted for Obama. Her vote might have had little to do with ideology. She could not stomach the thought of Vice President Palin.

I stayed up late. As I watched, I remembered. In 1968 I was in the streets as a reporter, when the Battle of Grant Park ended eight years of Democratic presidents and opened an era when the Republicans would control the White House for 28 of the next 40 years. "The whole world is watching!" the demonstrators cried, as the image of Chicago was tarnished around the world. On Tuesday night, the world again had its eyes on Grant Park. I saw tens and tens of thousands of citizens with their hearts full, smiling through their tears. As at all of Obama's rallies, our races stood proudly side by side, as it should be. We are finally, finally, beginning to close that terrible chapter of American history

President Obama is not an obsessed or fearful man. He has no grandiose ideological schemes to lure us into disaster. He won because of a factor the pundits never mentioned. He was the grown-up. He has a rational mind, a steady hand, and a first-rate intelligence. But, oh, it will be hard for him. He inherits a wrong war, a disillusioned nation, and a crumbling economy. He may have to be a Depression president.

What gives me hope is that a great idealistic movement rose up to support him. Some say a million and a half volunteers. Millions more donated to his campaign. He won votes that crossed the lines of gender, age, race, ethnicity, geography and political party. He was the right man at a dangerous time. If ever a president was elected by we the people, he is that president.

America was a different place when I grew up under Truman, Eisenhower and, yes, even Nixon. On Tuesday that America remembered itself, and stood up to be counted.

This land is your land,
This land is our land,
From California, to the New York island.
From the redwood forests, to the Gulf Stream waters--
This land was made for you and me.

Thursday, October 23, 2008

How Many Film Industry People Does It Take to Screw in a Lightbulb?

Have you ever wondered how many people it takes to make a movie?  I ran across a blog called Film Industry Bloggers.  Every day of the week, except Sunday, five to six film industry specialists blog about topics of interest to them.  They have 32 bloggers in all.

How does this relate to what we do?  Chuck and I fill many of the roles listed, except for the actor of course.  Any task that goes on BEHIND the camera, not in front of it, we'll do.  We can relate to the musings of the Film Bloggers who are employed as: director (on our commercial shoots), producer, production designer, storyboard artist, music supervisor, digital expert, colorist, animation coordinator, editor, key grip, production manager and voice over artist.  Love this blog!

Monday, September 15, 2008

Beauty

What is beauty?  Wikipedia says it is a characteristic of a person, place, object or idea that provides an experience of pleasure.  Often beauty is open to interpretation -- "Beauty is in the eye of the beholder."  Many have written about it, trying to capture its elusive nature.

"Everything has beauty, but not everyone sees it."
---Confucius

"In every man's heart there is a secret nerve that answers to the vibrations of beauty."
---Christopher Morley

"When you have only two pennies left in the world, buy a loaf of bread with one, and a lily with the other."
---Anonymous

Everyone enjoys seeing beauty, however we define it.  Of course the flowers, cake, venue and scenery at a wedding are all very beautiful.  But the greatest beauty we see at weddings is the image of the bride reflected in the eyes of the groom.  And sometimes we even catch a glimpse of beauty as the father of the bride looks adoringly at the mother of the bride as though it was their own wedding.

For the less romantic,  the sensations of love and beauty can be explained in terms of chemistry.  During the first stages of falling in love, phenylethylamine can be triggered by a meeting of the eyes or a touch of the hands resulting in sweaty palms and shaky knees. Chocolate is known to have very high levels of this chemical.  Maybe this is the stuff of which love potions are made.  

After infatuation subsides, endorphins take over.  This is what makes a relationship warm, dependable, calm, stable.  This is what makes you yearn for someone when they are away.  This is one reason why people stay married.

It's not surprising that we seek endorphins wherever they may be -- they just feel so good. That's why "All the world loves a lover."  Because their endorphins are spilling out and we are the beneficiaries.

So, what has inspired me to wax poetic about beauty?  Loyal readers may have noticed our blog is a little more beautiful.  My good and talented friend Stacie Tamaki, the wonderful web designer of Girl Goes Geek redesigned the blog and brought a little more beauty to the world. Thank you so much Stacie!

Wednesday, August 13, 2008

Is It Real or Is It Fake?

I saw a story on a blog the other day.

The author, Mark Christiansen who is well-respected in the visual effects industry, noted that parts of the Olympic Games opening ceremonies were faked for the TV audience. If you saw the opening ceremonies, the parts he’s referring to are the ‘footprints in the sky’ created with fireworks. The live audience did see footprints in the sky, but the TV audience saw a different set of footprints that had been computer-generated. It’s similar to having someone lip-synch the national anthem at the start of a baseball game.  Oh, but that happened at the opening ceremonies too!  The very cute 9-year old girl who performed the song was lip-synching to another girl's vocal track.  

As soon as the lip-synching was leaked, the world press had a field day calling the incident "Olympic Karaoke", "Hoax! Made in China", "The Great Beijing Lip-synch Switcheroo", and "China's Wrong Child Policy".

But back to the 'footprints in the sky."  There may have been very good reasons to ‘fake it’. Maybe the Chinese were afraid that the fireworks would be rained out. Or maybe the faked fireworks were more vibrant or easier for the TV audience to see. But it gives us a slightly uneasy feeling because the performance was portrayed as real when it wasn’t.

With the technology that’s available and the skill of today’s technicians and artists, you can’t always trust that what you see is the unvarnished truth. And, this sleight-of-hand can be done almost undetectably. So what’s the big deal? Well, an enjoyable pyrotechnic show at the Olympics whether real or faked is no big deal, although this was a fake on a pretty big scale. We all need be a little bit skeptical, like the folks in Missouri, the “Show-Me” state.

How does this apply to brides who are searching for the best professionals in each category? Scrutinize online reviews with a grain of salt.  Sure, there are less-than-professional vendors out there who deserve the 3, 5 10, even 20 bad reviews they get.  These are to be taken seriously because these companies routinely disappoint brides.  Chat rooms serve brides well in these cases.

On the other hand, there isn't one professional I know who hasn't been unfairly slammed with a bad review online.  In the first year we were in business, an unscrupulous competitor whom we had never met, posing as a bride, said some pretty nasty things about us that hurt us deeply since we care very much about giving our best to every bride. We provided evidence of the fraud to the hosting site, but they would not remove the post.  Thankfully, that was our only brush with 'the dark side'.

So, if you see virtually all excellent posts about a professional, and then you see a negative post, be skeptical.  Check it out for yourself.

Thursday, July 24, 2008

A Calmer Gentler World

I used to be a Type A personality with a CAPITAL A! I lived my life in CAPITAL LETTERS. EXCLAMATION MARK! But over the years I calmed down quite a bit. And even more so recently when I resolved to try to take 5 minutes - just 5 minutes a day - to breathe and relax. It's been a struggle to remember to integrate it into my life. But, when I'm in the car waiting at a red light and have nothing better to do, I somehow manage to do it.

I believe there's been a reaction to my action. I see a kinder, calmer, gentler world out there. Take last night. I went to Whole Foods to satisfy my craving for fresh oysters. Felix, the man behind the counter stepped up to serve me, with a smile. I told him what I wanted. As he reached into the tank to retrieve the mollusks, he accidentally squirted me with water - all over. Rather than getting mad, I laughed and thanked him for cooling me off. He was a bit horrified, asked if I was OK, and offered me a towel. But it was nothing. As he was shucking those little guys, he was explaining the difference among oysters, and how to tell if they are fresh. [Tap the shell. If it sounds like a rock, it's OK. If it sounds a little hollow, it is not OK.] By the time he was done, he'd filled my order, given me two samples, and sneaked in two extra oysters to make up for the soaking.

It's a small thing, but rich or poor, we all like to get a little something for nothing every now and again. I knew I'd be coming back many more times to buy oysters from Felix. Felix's act of kindness made me feel gentler as I moved on to the checkout. There, the cashier rang up my produce incorrectly four times. She was getting more and more flustered even though I told her not to worry, I was in no hurry, it was OK. I didn't have the heart to call her attention to another error. So, I headed over to customer service to correct the error.

The customer service manager confirmed I'd been overcharged. She cheerly refunded the entire amount for the produce in crisp dollars bills. I smiled and waited expectantly for her to weigh the red trevesino and tell me what I owed. But, she just smiled back, thanked me for my patience with the cashier, said it was their error, and apologized for my inconvenience. She said, "No charge." For the second time that night I felt calm begets calm. A smile begets a smile. In my Type A world, there would only have been misery. In my calmer, gentler world there is only peace.