Monday, May 15, 2006

Enduring Marriage

We filmed a wonderful weddng this weekend at the Ritz Carlton in Half Moon Bay. It is one of the most beautiful locations for a wedding in the Bay Area and every member of the staff set the standard for excellent service. The weather was absolutely perfect for our beautiful bride and adoring groom. They were surrounded by such warm families and friends. And, they incorporaed some fun activites. During the recessional, guests were invited to write their wishes for the happy couple on paper airplacnes and launch them in the direction of our bride and groom as they joyfully left the ceremony. Later on, everyone was invited to make s'mores out at the barbeque pit.

In addition to covering the wedding day, they asked us to do something a little different. We are preparing a short piece 'Enduring Marriage'. Our lovely couple wanted to hear how their close friends and family keep their marriages fresh, alive, ever-changing, and how they manage to weather the rough spots. We had our doubts about whether people would speak frankly enough about such intimate topics to be useful. Were we surprised! Our bride and groom knew their guests well. Everyone we spoke with was generous and articulate. They were funny, sincere, and genuine. Some had been married over 50 years. Others, for just 4 days. We learned so much, and it's already changed my thinking, and behavior in my own marriage.

This project had another impact. After reflecting on marriage and chatting with us, people were mindful of what marriage meant to them, and all the joys they had already shared. An atmosphere of a higher order of spirituality was created, of serenity, of gratitude, among all the guests. It was one of those times when everything seemed so perfect.

Without reviewing the footage, our general impressions were that a good marriage depends on consciously giving time and thought to the marriage and family; sacrificing and suppporting each other, doing small kindnesses for each other every day; letting go the little trifles; seeing the value of the differences between you; and being willing and able to change uncharitable thoughts to loving thoughts. Even the young flower girls, from observing their own parents' marriage, had some wise words to share.

We will condense the over 8 hours of conversations to a 20-minute piece which our lovely couple will present as a gift to their guests. We felt honored to be asked to work on this project, and felt blessed to come to know all those who freely shared with us.

We wish our wonderful couple a lovely honeymoon and a lifetime of contentment.

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